In the Mancala game, the players vacillate between having full and empty cups. My daughter and I were able to squeeze a match in the day she left home for her final semester in college. We can accomplish only so much before it is over, enabling life’s adventures, doing the right thing and taking pride in our achievements. But when opportunities are gone and the time comes to be moving on, it is okay to be exhausted.
I feel like we did our best.
I Like That Color – Emotional Honesty
I have truly enjoyed the holidays these past ten years, especially the last few. Possibly it is because of emotion-freeing changes. Recently Lynn told me:
"Dan, I’m sure I speak for everyone when I say this – we all get scores of emails daily. Life in health care speeds up during the holidays as emotions about ‘last holidays’ and changes in holiday routines cause emotional difficulty for our patients as you can well understand. On top of all this, we have our own personal holiday issues to deal with, and as you also know, not all caregivers or health care professionals are without their own problems."
There are times in life where you really don’t have control. The unimagined becomes real, the impossible occurs, and change happens, transporting you into situations you always thought only involved those "other guys."
It is exactly for these times we may rejoice and find consolation in the diversity of our makeups.
"When you don’t beat ’em you’ll join ’em." Consider the mother of young children who tells her kids "Don’t play in the rain water and get your clothes dirty." Over and over she repeats her plea but they keep returning to the same spot. In the end, mom joins the mayhem at the mud hole, laughing and having fun, making an infinitely more generous concession in her decision to be life-giving.
When it becomes apparent your objections don’t achieve the intended result, consider alternatives. When the only remaining options all appear dismal, find a way to validate the goodness of humanity.
"I like the color you picked."