Personal Testimony

My "Caregiver’s cause" tries to put a name on intangible feelings so other people experiencing similar emotions can find inner strength to deal with unknowns.

The easy answers to your questions are these: My name is Dan Zeorlin. A few years ago I studied Mandarin (my name became "dan ze lin" for the classes). I learned some basic Chinese words and characters. A job associate Li Chun asked "why I signed up to learn Chinese." It seemed like a small price to pay in appreciation for his tremendous assistance at work. (One day at Boling’s restaurant, his young son gave me a picture he had been coloring and I said "Xie xie ni." The boy turned to his mom and said, "He speaks Chinese!" My opportunity to feel gratitude and see pride makes this effort worthwhile.)

Chun helped me set up the blog. I choose the name of my muse to get it started. (I was inspired by two writers from the KCWG: "Mary-Lane KamBERG" and "Michelle LangenBERG.")

Becoming a caregiver was overwhelming for me (I’m not alone) and I vowed to give something back so other people might not necessarily know pain of alienation. This negative mindset is too prevalent in society. Too often you must grasp an enormous responsibility and get a handle on it–alone.

Everyone is welcome to collaborate in this Caregiver’s cause.

"Dan, I am sorry, but I cannot do this. I do not mean to be harsh, but I think I have made it clear by now that I need to grieve privately right now. Apparently you do not understand how painful it is for me to keep getting these requests from you. I need for you to stop making them. My grief for (spouse) is fresh and raw, and to be perfectly honest with you, you are making it worse. In addition my job is incredibly demanding now. Beyond the (job description), I have nothing left to give right now. Please respect my wishes. At this time, I simply cannot help you."

I’m not trying to usurp anyone’s status quo as they have their own ways of "handling" caregiver’s issues. I’m not trying to become a webmaster. I’m not even sure why I give a damn about anything anymore. Oh yeah, I remember. It is so other people–future generations perhaps–can have it better than we did.

I tried my best to give real insight into what it was like to become a caregiver. If it sounds chaotic, I succeeded.

Xie xie ni.

Zelin

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