Here’s the one-two punch plan for recovery (or achievement or whatever needs to be done):
- Set goals
- Achieve goals
Now there’s no doubt about it. It is easier to cope with not reaching specific goals if you never set them. The frustration that comes from trying to achieve (and achieving) goals is learning that the goals set did not represent your truest desires. How does this happen?
Setting goals is the toughest part of life. It must be done in the dark before you “know now what you didn’t know then.” It represents the willingness to try and do something about anything. Notice all you must have is the willingness to try. This necessarily involves trying/doing but it does not require success (goal is reached). However the lessons learned from the trying/doing must be reintroduced so new goals can be set. This becomes an endless cycle.
The value in having a coach is when someone who sees a bigger picture pointa out things you’ve missed. A coach can be frustrating too when they aren’t perfectly aligned with your goals (or you aren’t perfectly aligned with their goals).
Sometimes we block things out in order to reach goals. This denial has ramifications too. Just as not reaching a goal has consequences, reaching a goal which was only obtainable through blocking of realities will cause future situations to become confounded. It is possible that other factors will linger and lurk well past reasonable expectations.